The 8 Female Orgasms (Continued)

The last in my 2-part series and I’ve left the most complex ones to last: The Cervical, Anal, Urinary, and G-Spot Orgasm.

5. Cervical Orgasm

The cervical orgasm, yes, the cervix can have an orgasm! Not only that, but it’s actually one of the strongest and most powerful orgasms we can have. Think ecstasy, warmth, flooding emotions, a sudden sense of connectivity with the partner that gave it to you – sounds divine? It’s deep, emotional, and requires a real ‘letting go’ and release.

How to have it

So, let’s delve in…literally. The cervix is located at the deepest part of the vagina, all the way in. It is the entrance to the womb, the uterus, so it’s a fair way up – feel a round bump at the dead end? That my friend, is your lover’s cervix. Be gentle now. It’s very sensitive and vulnerable. This isn’t an orgasm to jump into, ensure she is aroused. Stimulate the g-spot, vaginal entrance and clitoris using fingers, tongue, lips – basically, a whole heap of foreplay should have occurred by the time you get to this point. 

The cervix can feel painful, especially if jabbed at, so go in easy and simply stroke. Stroke the top of it, then up and around, and across the sides. It will take a decent amount of time, it may go through phases of feeling numb – keep going (for up to 30-60 minutes). Alternatively, during sex simply fill her completely with the penis, letting its head rest upon the cervix, leave it there with no movement and then allow her to relax (take a deep breath) and sink into it, this is effective if she isn't used to having her cervix open to this new type of stimulus, this is a good starting point and of course, also feels divine. 

Harpers Hint

Like all orgasms, the end result should never be chased – I’m partial to having my cervix simply stroked gently or lovingly nudged at the right angle by the right shaped penis, with no orgasm in mind – it just feels nice. So, go in with no other expectations than to find the cervix and have a little spiritually sexy soiree with it. 

6. Anal Orgasm

The anal orgasm, ah ha, I sense you’ve been eagerly awaiting this one. Let’s tip toe around the enticing no-go zone that so many of us like to go – bum sex. The anus is a highly sensitive area, an erogenous zone full of nerves and so for many, anal sex feels incredible. For others it’s a placidly nice stimulation, and for some it’s a complete out of bounds sex act. An anal orgasm is localised around the genital area and tends to tighten the sphincter as it explodes pleasure – it’s a raw, rough, and very physical orgasm. 

How to have it

Relaxation is key. Relax, relax, and relax.  Use plenty of lube and make sure you (she) are warmed up, the muscles (and mind) need to be prepared so I feel anal sex is best not aimed to be ticked off the night-time agenda hastily – take your time. Start with a finger and warm up to two fingers and then a toy or penis. And did I mention you need to relax?

Not up for all the way up there? The entrance is also a highly sensitive area, so if she isn’t into full penetration, a simple lapping of the tongue, firm press of the thumb on the entrance, or gentle stroke during other sexual acts will still offer a pleasing if she’s open to it.

Harpers Hint

A few things here: if she aint into anal, she aint into anal. And if she is, it’s always polite to ask whether she’s in the mood for it before you go charging in there. Remember to not go near her vagina with anything (fingers, tongue, toys, or penis) that came in contact with her anus – this is a sure-fire way to give her an infection and I guarantee she won’t let you near it again.

7. The G-Spot Orgasm

The G-Spot is much like the Bermuda Triangle – so mythical that at times you wonder if it even exists and if eventually found…it’s inevitably hard to navigate, so most (sexy sailors) abandon ship and give up. Persevere though, as the G-Spot orgasm, or at least stimulation therein, is a one-of-a-kind and an overwhelming experience. So, settle in sailor, all aboard to learn the intricacies of the expansive, earth-shattering pleasure point that is the G-Spot.

The G-Spot is a fleshy, soft, and ridged area that feels slightly different to the surrounding vaginal tissue. It’s located inside the vagina, on the vagina ceiling, about halfway between the entrance and the cervix - extra juicy and swollen when aroused. The orgasm itself is a long and lengthy one. The build-up unfolds gradually and mirrors the final climax with long and slow warmth. It feels deep and expansive through the vagina, pelvis, and sometimes upwards through the body. It’s unlike a clitoral orgasm, which is sharp, localised, and crashes suddenly.

How to have it:

Using an index and middle finger, insert into the vagina – make sure there is lubrication, natural or synthetic. Curl or hook the fingers towards the clit, under the pubic bone, locate the ridged fleshy area and gently stroke. Note: You can be much rougher with the G-Spot than with the clitoris. Take your time; build up to a more vigorous stroke and even a ‘pulling’ movement. This is ideally done over a long period, 20-30minutes or after a clitoral orgasm. She may feel the urge to pee (this is normal) so start with an empty bladder.

 A penis can also bring about a G-Spot orgasm; simply, logistically manoeuvre yourself and your lover into positions that would have the penis hitting the upper vagina wall.

Liquid Gold. When the orgasm peaks, sometimes there might be an expelling of fluids from the vagina, known as female ejaculation, or lovingly named: squirting or gushing. This is not a guarantee and a G-Spot orgasm can still take place without this.

Harper’s Hint

Patience is crucial with this orgasm, as well as compassion and understanding. The G-Spot orgasm can take up to half an hour and any type of orgasm for a female comes from the mind first. So, take the pressure off and simply go in (literally) with no expectations other than to stroke her vagina wall for 20mins and have a damn good time whilst at it.

8. Urinary Orgasm

Lucky last, the pee pee orgasm. Sorry, sorry, the Urinary Orgasm. Left to the very end due to the difficulty I’ve had in finding anyone on this earth who has even heard of this orgasm, let alone had one…successfully. 

I take my job very seriously, and my blog slightly less so – but I’ve still felt compelled to deliver a first-hand account of each and every orgasm in the mythical collective eight. Alas, I have never had a urinary orgasm, and even more frustrating is that it seems no other female has either. So, in the name of field research, one Friday evening I found myself armed with an empty diary, a raging sex drive, and a desire to have written on my tombstone ‘Miss Jones, remembered proudly as a loving daughter, entrepreneur, and the only known woman to have had a pee pee orgasm’, I set out with tips and tricks from google, my favourite moderate size dildo, a hot running shower and two 1.5-litre bottles of Evian. 

I can now confirm that, I have absolutely never had a urinary orgasm. But after my experiment, I have now successfully peed on myself in the shower. I hope you appreciate my dedication to this blog?

The details

Contrary to what you may be thinking, a urinary orgasm is not a golden shower (although it felt like that's all I personally gave myself in my shower one Friday evening). It’s a very rare orgasm felt by a woman when she urinates. Which, upon reflection makes sense as the genitalia area is bombarded with nerves and pleasure spots. As much as I joke, orgasm equality and adequate bedroom skills are no laughing matter and this orgasm is serious business, it’s an intimate orgasm and requires a trusting and non-judgemental lover – I’m not ruling out trying it again with the right person. We are all into wild and wonderful things in bed, and this is no different. 

How to have it

It’s likely to happen to a woman after she’s had sex and not experienced an orgasm yet, so when she visits the bathroom moments after, they can then have a urinary orgasm. To experience it, start by drinking 3 litres of water and then have sex (or masturbate). When you can't hold it in anymore, urinate (ideally while your partner is still inside you). A simple urinary orgasm might feel light, tingly, and fun, but a deeper urinary orgasm may feel intense and full-body due to the overwhelming sense of relaxation and surrender. 

Not ready to let it flow with an audience?  Simply go to the toilet and urinate privately. 

Harpers Hint

As always, consent is cool, and no-one wants to be peed on by surprise, so this is very much an orgasm where in which prior discussion is required. 

Well I do hope you’ve enjoyed learning about the eight female orgasms! My greatest advice to take away is to just be yourself and an open-minded lover, one in which anyone can feel comfortable to express their pleasure with - and just have fun!




Harper Jones